By rocklee
09 January 2008 08:59
How do I negotiate with an angry farmer - even if I'm in the right?
Answer
By Country Walking magazine
This is a question that buries to the heart of human psychology, whether you’re faced with an irate farmer, a road rage driver furious at your actions, a customer from hell or a boss from Hades.
In such circumstances, avoid fanning the flames of the conflict, swallow your pride and make a beeline for the moral high ground. No one ever defused a confrontation by being angrier than their aggressor, in the same way that pouring kerosene on a fire never douses the flames.
So while the following actions may stick in your craw and fly in the face of the facts, they are more likely to bring a swift and calm resolution to the situation.
1. Say you’re sorry. It’s a brilliant way of taking the wind out of your angry farmer’s sails.
2. Listen to what the farmer has to say, without interrupting or contradicting. His anger will swiftly burn itself out.
3. Explain where you were trying to walk. Show him your Ordnance Survey map, and indicate which public right of way you think you are on.
4. Ask the farmer to point out on the map where he believes you are.
5. Ask for his advice on the best way to reach the nearest public footpath.
6. Thank him and follow his directions to the nearest public footpath.
As you bite your tongue, remember that it’s not you who has made the farmer so angry. You are merely the straw who broke the camel’s back, and you’re bearing the brunt of other confrontations between him and other walkers. But nipping any potential conflict in the bud will minimise the potential for an unpleasant encounter to cloud your walk. And after all, for most of us, peace, quiet and an escape from the bile-filled cut and thrust of modern life are major attractions of walking.
Still not sure about the ‘walk away’ strategy? Then as you head for the moral high ground, bear this in mind from psychologist and author Oliver James, who says we need to think harder about the causes and origins of aggression. “It is highly likely that people displaying a propensity for aggression may also be suffering from a certain depression. The two are related. Anger and frustration may be directed against the self or outwards towards other people.”
Finally, if you have been chased off a public right of way, raise the issue with the your local Highway Authority (county, unitary, metropolitan, London, or national park), marking your letter for the attention of the Public Rights of Way officer.